South Tyneside Council pioneers embryonic research

Council Leader happy to be first

South Tyneside Council Leader Cllr. Iain Malcolm has pioneered Britain’s first politically motivated “admixed embryo” before Parliament has finished debating and deciding the ethical and legal issues surrounding this type of research. The multi-headed monster created outside of the normal processes, was developed by taking stem cells from a normal human embryo and they were injected with genetic material from multiple “political animal” sources in the hope of creating a being that would be resistant to normal political protest.

Cllr. Malcolm who funded the research and development said;

“It may look a bit strange and odd, but in the future these hybrids may save us an awful lot of time and money, people will eventually get used to them, and of course if they don’t work we can always destroy them. The ethical issues will soon be agreed, I feel confident that this is the way to go and I’m proud that South Tyneside is pioneering this science, we are so happy to be the first.”

When asked if his development could lead to disease resistant politicians who could outlive all other humans, Cllr Malcolm replied:

“You are starting to think like an Independent now, it’s a silly suggestion, these embryos are all under my ultimate control, I can create life and destroy it at will, but don’t worry I am a responsible man, I instinctively know what is good for us. It is this sort of irresponsible thinking which encouraged me to preclude certain species when we admixed the stem cells”

Prime Minister Gordon Brown is reported to be delighted this morning!

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Car Rally, South Shields

Crowds flock to Souter Lighthouse

I’ve had a busy day entertaining my children and shooting lots of pictures for use in South Shields Daily Photo. we started this morning by going to Souter Lighthouse, Marsden, South Shields to see a fantastic collection of extremely well kept and cared for cars. The rally was organised by the Morris Minor Owners Club, and they had some real beauties on show.

Restored, resplendent, and in gleaming showroom condition, Jaguars, Triumphs, Capris, Escorts, Daimelers, Jaguars, a Jensen, and a great collection of “moggies”. They had attracted a good crowd too, but the weather temporarily interrupted with one heavy rainshower, out came the chamois leathers!

I’ve put together a quick slideshow so you can see the sort of free entertainment that South Shields and South Tyneside is becoming renowned for, especially during the summer months.

After lunch we went to “Charlie’s Park” in Jarrow for the start of the Jarrow Festival, it was heaving packed there must have been a couple of thousand there at least! The Medieval Fayre went down a treat, as did the free entry into Bede’s World, the kids enjoyed the falconry and the fights best of all. I’ll stick another slideshow up tomorrow (if I get it finished in time)

It was so much better than reading the politics in the Sunday papers!

| View Show | Create Your Own

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Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Great entertainment

One of the engagements which kept me away from this keyboard yesterday was a family night out at the Sunderland Empire where we went to see a performance of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang on it’s farewell tour, we though the kids would enjoy it, but didn’t expect to be so enthralled ourselves. What a marvellous show which kept us captivated until 10:00 pm.

The cast included former BBC Blue Peter man, Easington born, Matt Baker playing Caractacus Potts, the inventor. His father was played by Adam Chance who used to be in Crossroads all those years ago, Wayne Sleep, who was brought up in Hartlepool, played the evil Child Catcher, Baron Vulgaria was played by former Emmerdale actor Edward Peel, Nigel Garton and Jaymz Denning were hilarious as the two spies from Vulgaria, the land whose ruler has banished children and vowed to steal Chitty, and Rachel Stanley’s Truly Scrumptious was indeed truly scrumptious. There was also a cameo performance from ‘Baldrick’ Tony Robinson. We shouldn’t forget the superb performances by the child actors either, nor the ten dogs!

However the car was the star, along with the work put in by the backroom boys. I was amazed at how the old film script could be so well adapted to suit the stage but the magic was created by the technical staff who designed and contrived the excellent backdrops, scenery, props, lighting effects and the whizz bang fireworks and pyrotechnics!

So if you want to be entertained by Potts and his family get along there, the show runs until the 7th. June before the car is retired.

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Gordon “Chubby” Brown

Funny impersonation of Gordon Brown in this video from Bremner, Bird, and Fortune.

“I’ve got a lousy tax policy to finish with”

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Demolition Man

Cllr. Jimmy Foreman in new role

Did anybody see South Shields Labour Cllr. Jimmy Foreman having whopping great big bags of fun with the big boys toys on television last night?

Some guys get all the luck yeah?

Jimmy was “dragged up” (as he would admit himself) on the Cleadon Park estate in South Shields, as was Mrs. Curly, and yesterday he was lucky enough to get behind the controls of a JCB and tear the old place down - not the whole estate, just his old boyhood house. I mean, what kind of fun is that? Come on lads you’ve all wanted to do it haven’t you?

Colin Campbell eat your heart out LOL.

The new Cleadon Vale development is coming along nicely now and it has been noted that supermarket operator Sainsbury is now operating on Prince Edward Road and also Ebchester Street, South Shields to take advantage of new markets created by the influx of large numbers of new private home owners.

Curly is a little perturbed by these developments, and sincerely hopes that Cllr. Foreman has not been given a new role in Labour’s South Tyneside cabinet, the old Town Development brief is meant to be Cllr. McAtominey’s after all, besides I’d hate to have to change someone’s nickname from “school dinner Jimmy” to “Demolition Man!”

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Blinking Miliband

Just to remind ourselves exactly what South Shields MP and Foreign Secretary David Miliband was thinking last year, here’s the YouTube video clip of him blinking, and blinking, and blinking making a mess of things with Dimbleby on Question Time. Trouble is, Gordon Brown seems to have messed up things in rather less than then the six or twelve months that David was apparently thinking about!

Now where did I mention things that might come back to bite you on the bum?

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This man speaks pure Geordie.

No corruption after over twenty years in Oz!

Amazing really, left South Shields twenty odd years ago after a career in the Royal Navy to make a new life in Australia, his professional position often takes him to Hong Kong and the USA, but unlike many others who manage to acquire a Cockney accent after 12 months in Putney, or a mid Atlantic accent after three years in New Hampshire “Andy” sounds as though he’s just stepped off the No. 42 bus from Henderson Road.

This photograph was taken last night in The Beacon on The Lawe, South Shields where a few of us gathered to meet and greet the man who reputedly fiddled around on with Freddie Flintoff’s lap top during the last Ashes tour! The small crowd who were there to greet “Andy” are all members of the Curly’s Corner Shop Message Board, the busiest little online facility in this part of the world for Sanddancers, ex-pats, and foreigners to get together for a friendly chinwag. “Andy” is back in South Shields with his wife and daughter to visit his mother, and on Sunday we will be hunting down David Miliband down at The Stadium of Light to request that he recommends “Andy” for some sort of special award for resisting the onslaught of “strine” for so long. He knows exactly where his Geordie roots and culture come from and he does his very best to export our hospitality, generosity, and common sense to our cousins down under.

As far as adapting to Oz cultures and habits “Andy” said he couldn’t give a XXXX!

Welcome home Andy.

Btw, can I recommend the Deuchars IPA.

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Deep impact

Nasa plans to land on asteroid

I’m sure people in South Shields will be equally fascinated and bemused by this news, it all seems like they’ve taken the script from the movie Deep Impact and decided to see if it can be achieved for real.

I wonder if they’d be willing to take a few politicians along with them? Let us be frank here, some of them should have been shot off into space just before conception!

I’d be tempted to offer free tickets to the BNP candidates who stood in South Tyneside last week, anyone else deserve a free ride?

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James Whale sacked

Talksport sacks controversial presenter

James Whale just seems to have been made for radio, his outspoken and brusque views have taken his career far since joining Metro Radio as a 22 year old in 1974. As a late night talk show host I was captivated by his sheer effrontery with most callers and listeners, as a form of entertainment it was savage amusement to an eighteen year old just finding his way in the world here in South Shields.

Whale, now 56, moved down to Leeds to join the fledgling Radio Aire before moving into television with an equally rebellious show which didn’t last too long. Lately, well at least for the past thirteen years, he has been a regular presenter with national Talksport Radio, that is until they sacked him today!

Whale publicly backed Boris on the radio during the London Mayoral election and transgressed Ofcom rules, so he had to go. However, breaking the mould, and bending or breaking a few rules have always been Whale’s stock in trade, it goes with the territory when you hire him, he’s a maverick, a one off.

Perhaps Metro Radio might now be interested in taking him back, I can see a hugely successful double act in the making, Whale and Tony Horne would cause chaos on the airwaves of Tyneside.

“Whale around the Horne” could be the best double act since Prescott and Blair!

Update

TV Scoop is reporting that James Whale has almost instantly been snapped up by Bid TV - weird or what? Looks like Metro has lost out on a golden opportunity.

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Knockout result

Remind you of anyone in particular?

Err……..YES!

South Tyneside Conservative Cllr. David Potts probably didn’t think much of the “knockout results” on Thursday night, let’s hope he found a decent party after the weekend to make up for things!

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